Anime You Will Never See In The U.S.- Akikan

Welcome to my first installment of Anime You Will Never See In The U.S. So, how can you tell when an anime's plot is going to end up being rediculous? When it involves empty cans of soda turning into magical girls when someone drinks out of it, that's what. I knew from episode one this anime was going to turn out to be bottom of the barrel shlock, so let's just say there were no disappointments whatsoever. So, what is this anime ultimately about? Nothing but twelve episodes of trying to find out if steel cans are better than aluminum cans. That's pretty much it.
   It turns out that Japan produces two types of cans, aluminum and steel. The Japanese government decides that it is too costly to produce both types, so they decide to pull out some magical pixy dust from God knows where, turn the cans into magical girls, and have them duke it out in some bizarre tournament to see which type of can they will continue to produce. I really wish I was making this up. 
   Enter Kakeru Daichi, your typical perverted high school student that no girl in her right mind would want to be around, except for his childhood friend Najimi Tenkuji. He ends up buying one of those cans, a melon flavored can of soda,  from a vending machine to reveal a young girl aptly named Melon and the rest is pretty much history.
   The show is primarily a fanservice comedy, however they also try to throw in some romantic drama element about the cans becoming romantically attached to their owners and vice versa. You know, if this is some contrived message about recycling, I think I would rather dump my trash into the nearest storm drain thank you very much. On top of that, the humor in this show ranges from occasionally funny to absolutely tasteless with scene after scene full of cringe-worthy innuendo.
  Atop of that, we also got a mix of characters that range from incredibly bland to absolutely disgusting; complete with a government official who is an admitted homosexual pedophile who fantasizes about doing his thing with high school age boys. There is also one character who is so bland, he literally fades in and out of existence! Now that takes talent!
   Akikan literally means "empty can" and boy does it live up to it's name! The characters are forgettable, the humor is extremely low brow, and the story, what ever little there is, is boring and uninteresting. I don't know anybody who would be stupid enough to purchase a license to this anime and quite frankly, this is one anime title you will never see in the U.S.!